The Danger of the Single Story
Everyone has their own unique narrative. Their upbringing, their beliefs, their life experience, all combine to determine how they look at the world and what their narrative looks like. Intact families can work collaboratively even though each member has a very different narrative, because they are working towards the same goal-the wellbeing of their family.…
The importance of family identity.
In my own extended family I have a brother who is adopted, a cousin who is the result of a donor egg, and a nephew who was born as a result of IVF and a donor embryo. The notion of what constitutes a family has changed radically over the last decades and it is becoming…
Giving children a voice
I do not think the value of listening to children and giving them a voice could be put any more powerfully then this poem that was recently brought to my attention. LISTEN When I ask you to listen to me, and you start giving advice, you have not done what I asked. When I ask…
Children’s Bill of Rights after Separation
The right to love and be loved by both parents without feeling disapproval or guilt. The right to be protected from either parent’s anger with the other parent. The right to be kept out of the middle of parental battles. The right not to pick sides. The right to avoid any complaints about the other…
Conversation series-Support for Children after Separation
Do not miss the next instalment in our Conversation Series when I discuss the vital topic of “Supporting Children after Separation” with my special guest Cathie Hutchinson. Cathie has a lifetime of experience and qualifications that make her the perfect person to discuss this complex but fascinating subject. She has a teaching background of over…
Intake- The Jewell In The Crown
Intake is a place of discovery, magic and imagination. When it is done well it is a dazzling jewel that lights up the way towards a bright and hopeful future. The Intake Session is an opportunity to set up the Settlement Conference that follows for maximum success. By connecting well, Family Dispute Resolution (FDR)…
10 Tips to encourage a child’s voice to be heard
Parents are often consumed with their own needs following separation, and the children’s needs can easily be overlooked. Encouraging them to put themselves in the shoes of their children can give them important insight and create a more holistic approach to the needs of the family. 1. How do your children feel about your separation?…
Highlights from Day 2 of the National Mediation Conference
Strategies for legally assisted culturally appropriate FDR More complex families experiencing trauma are accessing FDR. This presents significant challenges for the FDRP that require us to move in new directions and work in different ways. There are significant barriers for these families including: Lack of trust Fear eg of the children being removed Lack of…
Lessons from the National Mediation Conference Day 1
There is nothing more inspiring than getting together with a group of experts to discuss what you are passionate about! The National Mediation Conference in 2019 has a focus of “Over the Horizon”, looking at the essence of mediation for the future. So many fascinating presentations, but some significant standouts for me! Dr June Oscar-Whole…
10 Tips to deal with someone overwhelmed with emotion
Stay calm Do not get sucked into the vortex! Remain friendly and calm, maintain a reassuring tone of voice and body language. Be empathetic Show compassion by the use of empathy for what you are observing, attention to their experience, and respect for their distress. Focus on the future Do…