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Separation and the agony of waiting: an exploration

I listen to many stories each week about the difficulties of separation and the inevitable changes that it brings to life. They often involve feelings of agony when waiting for an end result, and yearning to move past the present-day towards a better future. A play I discovered that illustrates how it feels to be…

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10 tips for what you do when you are newly separated

Separating from your partner can be overwhelming, and knowing where to begin or what to prioritise is not always easy. Often, our minds can focus on the most obvious and practical things, but there are also more personal aspects that deserve just as much attention. To help give you a starting point that will prepare…

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Ambivalence as essential for behavioural change

When someone approaches a dispute resolver, mediator, coach, or lawyer for assistance, they are seeking support for alternation in their circumstances. They may want their situation or lifestyle to alter,  or they may be seeking that someone else’s behaviour be different. Essentially we are being asked to help another to bring about these changes. A…

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Tips for Good Conversation

CONVERSATION C          Have a Clear and purposeful intention for your conversation O         Be Open to the other person- try to put any assumptions or judgements to one side N         Be sensitive to the Non-verbal communication-notice the pitch, volume, pauses and energy in the other person’s speech, pay attention to whether the content of the words…

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The Wisdom of Books

When I was a young child my most precious possessions were my books. I kept them in a tea chest, and took great joy from unpacking them, rediscovering them, holding them, and connecting with what each of them meant to me. They were each a key either to the person who gave them to me,…

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The Value of the Visual in Mediation

When I first met Michael Hunt nearly 30 years ago, I was very impressed by his focus on the visual in mediation. He had white boards, butchers paper and many different coloured textas, and he used these very skillfully to support his role as a facilitative mediator.  He has since then taken this passion into…

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Good Communication When Working Remotely

This is an issue that we are all focused on at present! I was very lucky recently to be able to discuss this important topic with my great friend and colleague Marlene Ebejer. She is a leader in the family dispute resolution field, and it was a great privilege to have this discussion with her.…

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The Impact of Family Violence on Children

The current world is one characterised by considerable uncertainty and anxiety. This can be an opportunity to step outside our comfort zones and develop new coping strategies for personal growth and resilience. But it can also be a time when relationship difficulties can become overwhelming and stress of this masks our ability to manage this…

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Creating quality time for children during a lockdown

There is currently a 40 % increase in parenting matters being initiated in the Family Courts in the context of Covid-19. This reflects the great challenges for parents in navigating this difficult and challenging time. Whether as professionals responding to parents in these circumstances, or parents searching for guidance, we need to understand what is…

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Tips for planning family activity during social isolation

Some ideas for making Covid-19 leave your family stronger and closer! Establish a routine for the whole family, talk about this, and communicate about it as a family so it is well understood and committed to by everyone Be flexible and creative to provide interest and variety, and to allow for improvement as time goes…

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